It isn't ignoring a person's failures or drawbacks. That's not healthy for any kind of relationship. Let's be real people- we all screw up. No point in expecting otherwise from the people around us, or even ourselves. But choosing how we view people has a significant impact on the health of your roommate relationships.
It's really a three fold process:
I. Look for what you admire
The very large majority of people you meet will have some sort of good character traits and qualities. It's important to pick out something in them that you respect, early on in the friendship. It makes it easier to accept the things about them that you don't like about them so much.
II. Remember that differences are strengths
This is huge. Seriously. If everyone was the same as me, no one would pass Economics class. So we definitely don't want that. Just because we don't relate to a personality on an individual level doesn't mean we can't see the value of that personality. I'm not laid back, but boy oh boy am I glad that there are people who are!
III. Uplift and Encourage
Let people know you value them. Simple as that. If your roommate makes time to have a movie night with you, thank her. If he takes the trash out on his way to work, tell him you appreciate it. It keeps the apartment vibe uplifting and it creates opportunity for dialogue during the conflicts.
No comments:
Post a Comment